A Star Thrower in all of us

A much loved and adapted story by Loren Eisely from his anthology, The Star Thrower, tells of a man who combs the beaches after a large storm, looking for stranded starfish to return to the safety of the sea. A skeptic asks the man what impact can he make, being only one person, in the face of so much destruction. The man replies that, "The stars," he said, "throw well. One can help them."

After observing the man's efforts, the skeptic comes to realize that he too, is a "star thrower", and "He is not alone any longer. After us, there will be others...We were part of the rainbow...Perhaps far outward on the rim of space a genuine star was similarly seized and flung...For a moment, we cast on an infinite beach together beside an unknown hurler of suns... We had lost our way, I thought, but we had kept, some of us, the memory of the perfect circle of compassion from life to death and back to life again - the completion of the rainbow of existence".

What about you? What stars do you throw back into the cosmic sea to thrive?

Thank you so much, Martha@A Sense of Humor is Essential

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Tuesday's With Kris: You're Perfect

A very funny and inspiring joke for your Tuesday. Sometimes we need to be reminded that the fact that we are not perfect, makes us perfect.

A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.             While on the operating table she had a  near death experience. Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"                God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."           Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.                       After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.                    Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had  another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"            (You'll love this)  God replied: "I didn't recognize you."          Motive of the story:  God loves you the way you are.

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TRUTHS for MATURE HUMANS

Martha asked me to cover today and I've been so swamped lately that I couldn't immediately come up with a topic.  I started searching my emails for inspiration.  I ran across this little gem and thought it would be fun to offer up some levity to begin our week by.

• I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
• Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
• I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
• There is great need for a sarcasm font.
• How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
• Was learning cursive really necessary?
• Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
• Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
• I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
• Bad decisions make good stories.
• You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
• Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
• I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
• I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
• I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
• I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
• I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
• I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
• How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
• I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
• Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
• Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
• Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
• The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

Ladies.....Quit Laughing and have an AWESOME week.

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R & R for Sunday, November 28th, 2010

FINISH WHAT YOU START! 

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.

R and R Tip # 25: RESIST putting things off until another day
Ninety-nine percent of all failures come from people who have a habit of making excuses ~George Washington Carver, Chemist
 
Procrastination makes you feel both indecisive and guilty. You're indecisive because you choose to postpone what must be done and guilty for not doing, now, what you need to do. The more often you procrastinate, the weaker you feel.
 
Our world gets this way sometimes, too. Life happens in unexpected ways and the road we're traveling makes unexpected turns. Before long, we find ourselves in places we never anticipated, wondering exactly where we are. If we are not careful, we panic and make things even worse
 
All the noise and distraction around us makes it difficult to remember to stay focused and take action every day. So we stall and drift back into those old habits and patterns. Your goal is relegated to your wish list and you become frustrated again.
 
Rise above any disappointments and keep trying.
 
One of the great things about our Motivation Station is that there is always someone around to try and keep us accountable. The folks here are just like lots of you with real problems and I am blessed to be a part of them. I read that one way to stay focused is to have an accountability buddy and in some way I hope that I can be one of your buddies and I hope you'll be one of mine too.

I was going to procrastinate, but I put it off. 

See you all next Sunday!
Love, Live, Laugh and Be Happy!
ma

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BLACK FRIDAY aka NIGHTMARE at the MALLS

Jen talked yesterday about black Friday and I wanted to expand that a bit today.

The term BLACK FRIDAY appears to have been coined in Philadelphia by the police, where it was originally used to describe the heavy and disruptive pedestrian and vehicle traffic which would occur on the day after Thanksgiving. Use of the term began around 1966 and was used primarily on the east coast It began to see broader use around 1975. Later an alternative explanation began to be offered: that "Black Friday" indicates the period during which retailers are turning a profit, or "in the black.

I know many of you probably love to participate in Black Friday.  I for one, can't stand it.  I like to enjoy my Thanksgiving weekend in its entirety!  That means sleeping in on Friday, Saturday and Sunday at least until 7.  I refuse to get up and go shopping at 3 AM for anyone or anything!

More importantly, at least to me, is that I don't want to rush through an important family holiday just so I can get up at 3 AM (if I got to bed at all) and go stand in line all day to spend money.

Thanksgiving in the United States was observed on various dates throughout history, but by the mid 20th century, the final Thursday in November had become the customary day of Thanksgiving in most U.S. states. It was not until December 26, 1941, however, that President Franklin D. Roosevelt, after pushing two years earlier to move the date earlier to give the country an economic boost, signed a bill into law with Congress, making Thanksgiving a national holiday and settling it to the fourth (but not final) Thursday in November.

Traditionally, for me anyway, "Black Friday" has been spent sleeping in, eating turkey sandwiches, putting up the Christmas tree, wrapping gifts (because I am done shopping by Thanksgiving since most of my items need to be shipped), watching old movies, baking and any other thing that comes to mind.

So if you participated in black Friday, I hope it was safe and enjoyable for you.  May I suggest next year though that you take it all a bit slower and enjoy the weekend long and leisurely?  Maybe take that weekend to make your gifts or holiday cards and enjoy the Thanksgiving holiday AND the beginning of the Christmas Holiday season with your family.

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Frugal Fridays With Jen- Thoughts For Black Friday

""He who does not economize will have to agonize"- Confucius

Today is the biggest shopping day of the year in the US, but I want to remind everyone that one of the biggest and best tools of saving money, is not to spend it in the first place.

One of my favorite sources of motivation to spend less is reading success stories. My well-thumbed Complete Tightwad Gazette is full of them. You can read more online at Dave Ramsey's website here.

What is more fulfilling, having the latest gewgaw, or having one less monkey on your back?

As a child, we always lived hand to mouth, and I remember being filled with worry when I was in grade school, that we could lose our house or not have money for food. Living now without credit card debt and with a healthy savings account is 800 times better than living in fear.

As you head out to start your Christmas shopping, take a moment to think about your motivation for what you are buying. Does it add or detract from your family's security? Will it make you feel better in the long term or worse? Is it helping your family become the next success story?

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Thursdays With Linda: Happy Thanksgiving!

Wishing Everyone a A Very Happy Thanksgiving from All Of Us here at The Motivation Station from our Homes to Yours!!

Share your Thanksgiving Traditions and What you are Thankful for in the comment section…  Happy Eating…

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An Exercise in Gratitude for the Other 364 Days

I read a wonderful article in the Wall Street Journal today, "Thank you. No Thank you.", that described the many physical, pyschological, and sociological benefits of practicing sincere and mindful gratitude for those of all ages.

There were many appreciation exercises described including keeping a gratitude journal, making a list like Kris shared Tuesday, or expressing appreciation with a personal visit.

Other techniques to develop gratitude included being accountable to a friend to share gratitude lists, reflect on good times with stories and photos, and to be mindful of any negative inner self talk towards others and yourself, which can really lower your mood.

I am engaged by this Buddhist self reflection exercise that asks us to ponder daily -
"What have I given to?

What have I received?

What trouble did I cause?"

So in the spirit of mindfullness and deep heartfelt appreciation for the gifts each of you so abundantly possess and generously share, Thank You.

May your blessings be many, and your troubles few.

Martha@A Sense of Humor is Essential

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Giving Thanks...

Thanksgiving is this week and I always like to really sit back and think of what I am thankful for. It seems cliche, maybe trivial, but it's really the only way to visualize what we have and realize that we have it pretty good.

Good things and bad things happen all the time but I have to count my blessing and be thankful for:

... the roof over my head.
... the boyfriend that makes me laugh the moment I get home, fall asleep, and wake up.
... my father who supports me so that I can achieve my dreams.
... for my job, for no matter how it makes things difficult it pays rent and puts food on the table.
... my cat Martin for being my best friend.
... my legs, for being able to get me to where I need to go everyday. I am working to make you stronger!
... the sun, and it's energy.
... certain friends of mine, for listening and being interesting.
... my blog friends, for sharing insight and creativity.
... America, no matter how much I complain about you I know how important my rights are here and how in many places it just would not be so.
... the printed word. I love getting more information. A brain (unlike a tummy) can never be too full!


What are you thankful for? Go ahead and write it down!

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A PLACE FOR EVERYTHING & EVERYTHING IN ITS PLACE

Hi everyone, Tamy here again for Martha.  You all know how Martha and I have been reminding you to get your affairs in order for your families?  Well, Martha has been working at sorting out her mother's life since her passing and asks you to forgive her but she is just not ready to come back yet as she has been working diligently to make sense of it all.  She will be back next Monday though!

Several years ago I bought my mom one of those books, "What my family should know".  She has been great about getting it all filled in though I already pretty much know where she keeps everything, but not everyone does.  It really doesn't matter how old we are either.  If you have kids you need to be organized and prepared which brings me to my point today.  Have you seen the new Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel movie, "Life as we know it"?

I don't think it got very good reviews, but I thought it was cute and it proves my point here.  As parents, having those ducks in a row, wills in place, insurances paid up, college funds in place, god parents chosen and prepared are essential.  OOPS, that's kind of what this movie is about - the parents forgot to mention the plans to the god parents and get them prepared.  

In the end we can always work it out, but life moves so much smoother if we're prepared.  So if you need a cute rental, I recommend this movie to lighten your mood and maybe it will help you get more prepared.

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R & R for Sunday, November 21st, 2010

R AND R TIP #24: REFRESH your attitude

We're all very much aware how time goes by so quickly. We're more than half way through November and the weeks seem to be flying by. Much of our time and what happens in our lives is outside our control. But much of it is very much within our sights too, particularly what is happening in the present moment. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago. Nothing is as close as right now.

Today I'm sharing some tips that you can start implementing today to help improve and elevate your altitude.

Pause. Remember the old saying stop and smell the rosea? Well...stop means pause.

Breathe. Nothing helps to foster mental clarity more effectively than a few deep, meaningful breaths. (Why not take a few deep breaths now?)

Question better. You should ask yourself these two very important questions, and ask them often, What's good in my life right now? and when events happen,What's good about this situation? And then with an open mind, let your brain search for answers. Your brain will come up with great answers, because these are great questions. Now do the math: Great questions + great answers = great attitude. Bad questions + bad answers = bad attitude.

Remember more things that really matter. Close your eyes for a moment, and think about a time when everything seemed to be going your way... Really focus on that feeling. Did you know that it's possible to experience that feeling again?

Forget things that don't really matter. Spend your valuable time focusing on what you want, and simply forget about what you don't want. Anything that you put energy into expands. And if you forget about it, it magically dissolves from your experience. What do you need to forget about and let go?

Smile more. Sure, we’ve all heard it before. But let’s not forget the importance of a smile and what it can do to change our mindset and physiology almost instantly

A smile costs nothing but gives much. It enriches those who receive without making poorer those who give. It takes but a moment, but the memory of it sometimes lasts forever. None is so rich or mighty that he cannot get along without it, and none is so poor that he cannot be made rich by it. Yet a smile cannot be bought, begged, borrowed, or stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given away. Some people are too tired to give you a smile. Give them one of yours, as none needs a smile so much as he who has no more to give

Author Unknown

Smiles are free, yet pay big dividends. Your attitude ALWAYS improves when you share a smile. And if you can let it become a laugh, you'll take your attitude to a whole new level. Laugh often.

Dream big. When you were young, your dreams were BIG. But somewhere along the line, you may have had your dreams mocked, ridiculed, doubted, or even crushed. Your dreams and your imagination are the keys to a lifetime of joy, fun, and freedom. Keep your dreams alive, and spend time daily thinking about them and what actions your can start taking today in pursuit of those dreams.

Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day

Author Unknown

See you all next Sunday!

Love, Live, Laugh and Be Happy!

ma

More about → R & R for Sunday, November 21st, 2010

Earlier this week a family member was "hurt" because her grandfather had not acknowledged her high school graduation.  She just graduated about 2 weeks ago, quite late and at an unusual time.  She did not send out announcements, but made an "announcement" on facebook that most family members never even saw.  A niece mentioned to her that it was her responsibility to contact grandpa and that facebook was NOT the place to make that statement and expect recognition from everyone and that she should have sent out announcements or that the very least made personal phone calls.  The grand daughter disagreed. 

I openly admit that I'm old school.  I do expect an announcement and/or invitation to arrive in my mail box for things like high school graduations, weddings, showers and such.  I also expect a thank you card for the gifts sent for these events.  After all, it is common courtesy and also a good way to stay in touch with family and friends.   

EVERYONE loves getting snail mail - especially happy news snail mail!  

Ironically, I received a Dear Abby email a few days later that addresses this very subject and is perfect timing for the upcoming holiday season. 

DEAR ABBY: At Christmas, "Santa" always fills my children's stockings with a mix of fun, edible and practical items. A few years ago, when my oldest child was beginning to write, my husband and I started the tradition of tucking packets of thank-you cards into their stockings.

We explained that Santa must have given them the cards so they would have stationery to write thank-you notes to family and friends for the gifts they had received. The cards are a wonderful reminder to my children that they need to express their gratitude to those who have spent time and money to buy and send them a gift. Usually there are cards left over to cover thank-you notes at birthday time as well.

Unfortunately, these days, not enough people -- even adults -- take the time to write a note of appreciation for presents they are given. I believe parents should encourage children to do this as soon as they are able to understand the concept. I hope my husband and I are instilling a lifelong habit in our children. Abby, can you help get the point across? -- THANKFUL MOM IN BRUNSWICK, MAINE

DEAR THANKFUL MOM: Gladly. You are teaching your children an important lesson. It's a formality that started being ignored decades ago. Then, as years passed, it was a custom that was not just ignored, but many people forgot it existed. The result was that parents who hadn't been taught the social niceties did not teach them to their children.

When I publish letters about thank-you notes, I invariably receive an avalanche of letters and e-mails from readers complaining that they are hurt and offended because they don't receive thank-you notes. Some individuals use texts and e-mails to acknowledge gifts. However, for most people a handwritten note is much more memorable. Thanking someone for a gift, an invitation to a party or a kind deed in writing is important.

While composing a letter may always be a chore to some people, there are occasions when the written message is the only proper means of communication. It shows effort, and can become a keepsake. For those people who have difficulty expressing their thoughts, my booklet "How to Write Letters for All Occasions" covers a few basic rules for acknowledging gifts, expressing sympathy and accepting or declining an invitation. It can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds), to Dear Abby -- Letters Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. Not everyone can write letters that are literary masterpieces, but for anyone who wonders how to put in writing a brief, charming thank-you note, a letter expressing congratulations, a love letter -- or one that announces a broken engagement -- my booklet will serve as a guide to those who have put off writing because they didn't know what to say, how to say it, or even how to begin.

Because the season for exchanging gifts is nearly here, "Thankful Mom," your letter is an important and timely one.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

©2009 Universal Press Syndicate

You can find me at my home blogs 3 Sides of Crazy. Always Eat On The Good China, on Saturdays at THE Motivation Station on Sundays here at OUR KrAzY kitchen.

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Frugal Fridays With Jen- Frugal Thanksgiving

I'll tell you the best way to save money on food, as we all learned this week- it's to be so sick that you can't keep down anything more than a slice of toast a day. Ugh :(.

Today I leave you with a few quick links I've bookmarked myself with frugal Thanksgiving ideas. Any ideas of yours are always welcome! Right now I'm on the search for a dairy-free (or able to be made with dairy-free margarine) dessert that can travel 5 hours and still survive.

Frugal menu with prices included from Southern Savers. You can probably find comparable prices in your local area.

Tips for keeping your holiday cost down from Financial Highway.

Great roundup of frugal decorating ideas from Tip Junkie. I think even my craft-challenged self could make the homespun-looking burlap table runner.

Don't let anything go to waste! Use up that leftover turkey with this list of recipes from allrecipes. And if you're sick of turkey- freeze it and use it a couple months down the road, when you are less turkeyed out.

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Thursdays With Linda: Holidays…

Here at The Motivation Station we strive to motivate and inspire… However even the best motivators get a little down now and then… Life happens to all of us and how we deal with it is what inspires others…

The holidays are upon us… And even though they are meant to be the happiest time of the year, they can also be a bit sad…

So for this Thursday I am sharing some tips I found to help us look forward to the upcoming holidays…

The Following Tips were found at the MayoClinic.com

Recognize holiday triggers

Learn to recognize common holiday triggers, so you can disarm them before they lead to a meltdown:

• Relationships. Relationships can cause turmoil, conflict or stress at any time, but tensions are often heightened during the holidays. Family misunderstandings and conflicts can intensify — especially if you're thrust together for several days. On the other hand, facing the holidays without a loved one can be tough and leave you feeling lonely and sad.
• Finances. With the added expenses of gifts, travel, food and entertainment, the holidays can put a strain on your budget — and your peace of mind. Not to mention that overspending now can mean financial worries for months to come.
• Physical demands. Even die-hard holiday enthusiasts may find that the extra shopping and socializing can leave them wiped out. Being exhausted increases your stress, creating a vicious cycle. Exercise and sleep — good antidotes for stress and fatigue — may take a back seat to chores and errands. To top it off, burning the wick at both ends makes you more susceptible to colds and other unwelcome guests.

The Following Tips were found at the MayoClinic.com

Tips to prevent holiday stress and depression

When stress is at its peak, it's hard to stop and regroup. Try to prevent stress and depression in the first place, especially if the holidays have taken an emotional toll on you in the past.

1. Acknowledge your feelings. If someone close to you has recently died or you can't be with loved ones, realize that it's normal to feel sadness and grief. It's OK to take time to cry or express your feelings. You can't force yourself to be happy just because it's the holiday season.
2. Reach out. If you feel lonely or isolated, seek out community, religious or other social events. They can offer support and companionship. Volunteering your time to help others also is a good way to lift your spirits and broaden your friendships.
3. Be realistic. The holidays don't have to be perfect or just like last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change as well. Choose a few to hold on to, and be open to creating new ones. For example, if your adult children can't come to your house, find new ways to celebrate together, such as sharing pictures, emails or videotapes.
4. Set aside differences. Try to accept family members and friends as they are, even if they don't live up to all your expectations. Set aside grievances until a more appropriate time for discussion. And be understanding if others get upset or distressed when something goes awry. Chances are they're feeling the effects of holiday stress and depression too.
5. Stick to a budget. Before you go gift and food shopping, decide how much money you can afford to spend. Then stick to your budget. Don't try to buy happiness with an avalanche of gifts. Try these alternatives: Donate to a charity in someone's name, give homemade gifts or start a family gift exchange.
6. Plan ahead. Set aside specific days for shopping, baking, visiting friends and other activities. Plan your menus and then make your shopping list. That'll help prevent last-minute scrambling to buy forgotten ingredients. And make sure to line up help for party prep and cleanup.
7. Learn to say no. Saying yes when you should say no can leave you feeling resentful and overwhelmed. Friends and colleagues will understand if you can't participate in every project or activity. If it's not possible to say no when your boss asks you to work overtime, try to remove something else from your agenda to make up for the lost time.
8. Don't abandon healthy habits. Don't let the holidays become a free-for-all. Overindulgence only adds to your stress and guilt. Have a healthy snack before holiday parties so that you don't go overboard on sweets, cheese or drinks. Continue to get plenty of sleep and physical activity.
9. Take a breather. Make some time for yourself. Spending just 15 minutes alone, without distractions, may refresh you enough to handle everything you need to do. Take a walk at night and stargaze. Listen to soothing music. Find something that reduces stress by clearing your mind, slowing your breathing and restoring inner calm.
10. Seek professional help if you need it. Despite your best efforts, you may find yourself feeling persistently sad or anxious, plagued by physical complaints, unable to sleep, irritable and hopeless, and unable to face routine chores. If these feelings last for a while, talk to your doctor or a mental health professional.

Take control of the holidays

Don't let the holidays become something you dread. Instead, take steps to prevent the stress and depression that can descend during the holidays. With a little planning and some positive thinking, you may find that you enjoy the holidays this year more than you thought you could.

Happy Holidays…

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To Every Thing there is a Season

This post is dedicated to MarthaM and her family, and everyone, (including myself), whose holiday season is also marked with Grief.

Thanksgiving used to be my most favorite holiday, I have delightful memories of warm and wonderful times with my family.

That all changed when my older brother, Jim died 26 years ago at the age of 24 years old, on Thanksgiving Day. We were very close, I miss him still.

It was a very dark and sad time for our family, and for me. I went through such a period of self destruction, I sometimes am amazed that I survived at all. I couldn't let my parents bury two children, and I struggled through that part of the grief process with good counseling and support. I learned how important it is to take care of yourself during the acute grieving process.

I work to honor the love, life, and spirit of my brother, grandparents, and all my lost loved ones by creating new memories and sharing traditions with our children, family, and friends. This is their due, their right, my privilege, to share their stories and lives, and keep their love alive, and part of our lives, every day, especially during the holidays.

From the Book of Ecclesiastes, words attributed to King Solomon, popularized by The Byrds' song, Turn!Turn!Turn!

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, a time to reap that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

For those who are grieving this season, you are not alone, I abide with you.

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Tuesdays With Kris: Go-To-Dishes

We all have that one go-to dish that we run to when we are pressed for time or are in need of something nutritious. After my usual weekend of overindulgence I normally crave this dish. And crave and feast I did!

Brown Rice with Savory Sweet Beans

(serves 2 for dinner, and 1 for lunch the entire week- almost)

About 4 cups cooked brown rice.
2 garlic cloves, minced
3 pinches red pepper flakes
1 12oz can black beans, rinsed
1 12oz can tomatoes with chilies
1 12oz can sweet corn
Zest and juice of lime (you can squeeze juice in when serving each plate)
1 cup chopped cilantro
7 chopped scallions
salt and pepper to taste

In a large sauce pan. Heat oil and 2 minced garlic cloves. Add 2 pinches red pepper flakes and let soften. Add in 1 can black beans, 1 can tomatoes with chilies, and 1 can sweet corn. Bring to simmer for about 5-7 minutes. Zest 1 lime into the beans. Take off heat and let cool a bit. Add 1 cup chopped cilantro and 7 chopped scallions. Season with salt and pepper. Serve with rice, sour cream and extra lime wedges. SO TASTY and HEALTHY!

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GRIEF and the HEALING of POSITIVE EMOTIONS

Many of you already know that Martha's mother, Virginia, passed away quietly in her sleep this past Friday.  Martha has been struggling and juggling the responsibilities of her own family, a full time job and caring for her mother for quite some time now.

Martha contacted me and asked me to fill in for her on Monday.  No problems right?  Wrong, the more I thought about it the harder it became to find a subject that respected the gravity of the situation.  Then my husband came up with it.  Despite some of my own heavy posts this year due to elder care issues, the thing I am known for with my family and friends is my positive attitude.  In fact one night when hubby had had a few to drink (don't tell him I told you this) he told me that I was a real witch (okay, he used another word) because I could find the positive in ANYTHING - nothing ever got me down!  I'm not sure that is entirely accurate, but it was his perception and is a good place to focus.  So, I did some research today and found these thoughts:

Research on grief has previously focused primarily on negative emotions, such as depression, anger, anxiety, and guilt.  But, what about positive emotions, such as gratitude, pride, hope, and love?

Positive emotions are surprisingly prevalent among the bereaved, even relatively soon after the loss.

Positive emotions need not be intense or prolonged to produce beneficial effects. In fact, mourners with just a minimal amount of positive emotions and a great deal of negative emotion do better than those with no positive emotions at all.

Positive and negative emotions are independent of one another, and co-occur along side of one another.

Positive emotions play a role in regulating depression and other negative emotions that are associated with grief. 

Those who show more positive emotions in the first few months following the loss are likely to exhibit less grief and distress in the future.

Shifting mourners’ focus from negative emotions to positive ones provides a psychological break or respite, and also allows them to replenish their resources. 

Positive emotions can improve the way people cope with their loss.  As a result of gaining some distance from negative emotions and being restored and replenished by positive emotions, mourners are more able to focus their attention on the tasks that are most important to them and make progress on these tasks.

Focusing on What Matters Now
This approach for enhancing positive emotions asks mourners to consider the following question:  given everything that has happened, what matters to me at this point in my life?  

To some people, what matters now is working to prevent what happened to their loved one from happening to others.  Such individuals are often drawn to organizations such as Mothers Against Drunk Driving, where they are able to contribute energy and passion to the cause.            

It is important to note that for the bereaved person, what matters now may not be the same as what mattered before the loss.  

Utilizing these approaches can empower mourners and help them reclaim control of their lives. The research shows that just a small increase in positive emotions can produce beneficial effects.  The more one engages in these practices, the more positive emotions will continue to increase.  This can result in an upward spiral of wellbeing characterized by better relationships within the family, a greater feeling of connection with extended family and friends, and a greater appreciation for what is important. 

Martha will be back with us on Monday the 22nd.  Please keep her and her family in your prayers.

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R & R for Sunday, November 14th, 2010

R and R Tip #23: Ready yourself for a new week.


One thing I always have done on the weekend is to make sure I've got everything ready for Monday morning. When we have our laundry done, clothes pressed and laid out, groceries in the cupboard and food in the fridge, the week ahead sure does go a lot smoother.

If I want have healthier food options without sacrificing time on weeknights and mornings, I often prepare meals on Saturday or Sunday. I love having leftovers to use for another meal or even an extra casserole in the freezer that is ready just to take out and heat up.

Granted, this will take an hour or so out of the weekend, but it won't take any time during the week. Just prepare the meals, place them in some Tupperware, and put them in the fridge. Food that expires quickly is not the best option, but if proper precautions are taken, it won't spoil or even turn bad.


On Saturday or Sunday, I take about an hour to assemble an outfit for each day of the week. Some people like to set their clothes out the night before, but I always do a weeks worth. I have one of those over the door hangers that allows me to hang up what I'm going to be wearing.

Another thing that helps when you have to go off to work is to pack a lunch the night before. Eating out a lunch time gets to be very expensive and besides that what you pack is usually a lot healthier eating too.


If you have a family it also helps to have their clothing ready and lunches packed too. Of course if your children are old enough they can do it for themselves. You just have to make sure that they know it is their job. You've already done the shopping and the laundry, so they just need to put it together. Having things done the night before always makes for a smoother start in the morning.

Get more than enough sleep. The problem with getting enough sleep is that I always misjudge and that usually means I go to bed way too late Sunday night. We should aim for more than enough sleep and wake up rested and refreshed Monday morning.


When we prepare everything early, usually on the weekend when one isn't pressed for time we set our selves us for a really good week. 

 I don't know about you but for me Rest and Relaxation is a whole lot easier to find when you are READY for what lies ahead.

See you all next Sunday!

Love, Live, Laugh and Be Happy!

ma

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LIFE AS WE KNOW IT...

Life as we know it can change at the drop of a hat.  It's just that simple.  Without a huge story this week I'm just lacking any motivation for myself or to pass along to others.  I keep trying to see the world and the challenges as opportunities to grow and learn, really I do, but sometimes, I feel more like I'm batting my head against a brick wall.  I AM trying to carve out that piece of wall to see the blue sky with fluffy white clouds.  You know the one where under that sky is the green green grass with families picnicking in the park, flying kites, playing ball...  It's just slow work without the right tools.

Trying to balance everything is stressful for everyone.  We all have different coping mechanisms.  My best one is cooking.  Baking in particular is a great stress reliever.  Kneading bread is one of the greatest stress relievers I know and the end product is this wonderful bread.

PARMESAN CHEESE BREAD

3 1/4 cups unbleached flour
1 tablespoon active dry yeast
2 teaspoons sea salt
1 1/3 cup warm water
1/2 cup freshly grated Asiago Parmesan Cheese
extra-extra virgin olive oil

• Sift together the four, yeast and salt.
• Stir in the water until dough forms.
• Sprinkle with 1/2 the cheese.
• Transfer to a well floured surface.
• Knead until soft, elastic and no longer sticky (about 10 minutes). Add flour as necessary to reduce stickiness.
• Knead the dough until it remains rounded and doesn't flatten out when left to sit for a few minutes.
• Arrange into a round.
• Brush the surface with olive oil.
• Cover loosely with a tea towel and let rise in a warm place until double in size (about 2 hours).
• Preheat oven to 425 degrees.
• Brush a 9 inch round pan with olive oil.
• Put remaining cheese on a plate.
• Punch down the dough and knead a few more times with fresh flour.
• For rolls - divide dough into12 pieces.
• Roll each piece into a ball.
• Roll each ball in the cheese and then place in pan with the edges touching. 9 balls around the outside, 3 balls in the center.
• Cover with a flour sack towel and allow to rise again.
• Cut a small slash in the top of each ball.
• Sprinkle with more Parmesan cheese.
• Bake for 10 minutes and the reduce oven temperature to 375 degrees and continue to bake until golden and crispy, about 20-30 minutes more.
• Serve hot or transfer to a wire rack and cool and then slice.

You can find me at my home blogs 3 Sides of Crazy. Always Eat On The Good China, on Saturdays at THE Motivation Station on Sundays here at OUR KrAzY kitchen.  

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Frugal Fridays With Jen- Planning For Black Friday

When I was in nursing school, I often had to get up at 4am to make it to my clinical assignment by 7am. When I finished school, I swore I would never get up at the rooster's crow again for anything short of a crying baby or sick child.

Of course, that means that I will not be getting up at the crack of dawn the day after Thanksgiving to get the best sales. My family does not really focus on gifts- though we do focus on food- and my shopping list is very, very small. The husband and I don't exchange gifts, we don't exchange gifts with our siblings or extended family, and we do something small for our parents. We also feel strongly about not inundating our son with gifts. He gets a new coloring book, 6 used books I found on Paperback Swappers, a used Blues Clues computer game from Half-Price Books, and a couple board games I just got in a great Toys R Us deal this week for less than $2 each (the other games are stockpiled for future gifts). I spent a total of $11 out of pocket.

Black Friday can be a good day to plan for the next year's worth of needs and wants, however, as long as you don't go hog wild and buy more than you really need.

My suggestions:

Look ahead to the next 12 months and list out your gift-giving needs for the coming holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, and baby showers.

Think ahead, as well, to what might need replacing in the next year. Did you get your toaster for a wedding present back in 1978? Is it on its last leg? Are you sending a kid to college and needing things for the dorm room?

Once you have your list, keep an eye on those Black Friday ads and compare prices. I suggest these sites, Black Friday 2010 and Slick Deals, that keep a comprehensive listing of deals. When I am shopping for my weekly deals, I make a list for each store and the prices I can get for what I need. Sometimes I hit 1-2 stores, and sometimes I hit 8. If you are hitting a lot of stores, making a list and sticking to it will save you time.

Don't forget that if you can't stand the idea of the lines and mayhem of Black Friday, there is always Cyber Monday, with its online deals galore, all from the comfort of your own home. You can use the sites I linked to for those deals as well.

And most important of all, be patient and mannerly. No blender for $10.99 is worth beating up somebody's grandmother for!

More about → Frugal Fridays With Jen- Planning For Black Friday

Thursdays With Linda: Five Pound Challenge…

Thanksgiving is fast approaching… Only two weeks from today… Have you started planning your menu… Picked out the best turkey of the bunch…

I can already smell it… Golden Turkey… Pumpkin Pies… What’s your favorite Thanksgiving dish you look forward to eating…

I love the Cornbread Stove Too Stuffing…

But First before we can indulge in all the Thanksgiving fixings…

How many pieces of Halloween candy have you had…

Are you adding up steps on your pedometers…

I have had too many pieces of Halloween candy and Chocolate covered raisins and tortilla chips and potato chips………

And I have not been walking every day in addition to all my steps at work…

I have gained the three extra pounds I lost and two pounds into my thirty pounds I lost…

No… No… No…

I had planned to start as of November First to get back to losing… but with the worries of hubby not working and recovering from all the Halloween excitement and adjusting to the clock time change… It has been a time of getting my mind back in the right way of thinking…

So my goal for myself and anyone who wants to join in is to lose 5 pounds by Thanksgiving day…

We can do it!!

No snacking!

No second helpings!

No skipping meals!

Lots of water!

Lots of walking!

I have been at CSN.com trying to decide what to buy with my $75 winnings… It has not been an easy task… So many choices…

I have been looking for Pilgrim Figurines for years now and was excited to find the ones above at CSN but they are out of stock…

So I have found this exercise bike that works the upper and lower body… It also looks compact so won’t take up too much space…

I just can’t decide… What do you think…

 

Happy Veteran’s Day…

More about → Thursdays With Linda: Five Pound Challenge…

Homemade Chicken Soup for the Tummy and the Soul

Homemade Chicken Noodle Soup is a delicious, healthy, easy to prepare, budget friendly comfort food, especially this time of year when there is a chill in the air. (Which is anything below 65F here in Los Angeles.)

I prepare chicken noodle soup with the leftovers of a roast chicken. I simmer the "carcass" with sea salt, a bay leaf, garlic, and onion powder, and any other herb that catches my eye, including fresh ground pepper. Simmer for at least an hour, or all day, just use fresh filtered water, and monitor the liquid level.

After simmering, take out the bones from the liquid to remove any clinging meat. Also remove any large pieces of chicken from the liquid, and cut all meat into bite size pieces, then return to the pot. (Careful, the meat will be HOT, for which I have Cook's Amnesia and often forget this little tidbit.)

Thirty minutes prior to serving, I put in some roasted leftover potatoes, onions, carrots, and broccoli. I also boiled rotella pasta that I added to the soup immediately before serving, so as to prevent the pasta from absorbing too much liquid.

It's delicious, especially with some fresh, crusty bread and a salad. It also freezes beautifully.

Another variation of this recipe is Chicken Tortilla Soup with the additions of a can of diced seasoned tomatoes, defrosted frozen corn, beans, or any other leftovers, (like rice), or pantry deliciousness that is available. Please serve with tortillas or tortilla chips, and shredded cheese. Sour cream and sliced avocado too, yummers, Ole'!

You can also simmer the remaining bones in fresh, filtered water, herbs, and salt to make your own chicken stock. Use within three days if refrigerated, if frozen, a month.

Please share any variations, tips, or shhh, secrets, that you have for that perfect tonic for the tummy and the soul, Homemade Chicken Soup!

Thank you so much, Martha @ A Sense of Humor is Essential

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Tuesday's With Kris: Mornin' Iron!

Hey there! Kris from Behold the Metatron!

I've become a fan of having some greens in the AM. It's a great option to boost energy and get your brain working instead of relying on coffee and/or nothing at all! Spinach is rich in calcium, Folic acid, vitamin K, and C, iron, and fiber!

The flavonoids in spinach help protect against age related memory loss... talk about a great pre-work food!

{Sauteed spinach w/ turkey bacon, eggs and English muffin. Talking kitty in corner approves!}

Besides adding it to omelets or as a side to your breakfast, here are some other great ideas on how to sneak spinach in!

• Add chopped fresh or frozen spinach to lasagna.
• Add chopped or frozen spinach to soups (canned or homemade!)
• Sauté spinach with a bit of garlic as a side or topping for baked potatoes.
• Make spinach dip for veggies and crisp breads.
• Use fresh spinach on sandwiches or in salad in place of lettuce.
• Add chopped fresh or frozen spinach to pasta sauces or even Mac N' Cheese!

HAPPY TUESDAY!

More about → Tuesday's With Kris: Mornin' Iron!

HUGS, PRAYERS & COPING

Hi everyone, Tamy here filling in for Martha today. You all know that Martha and I  have been dwelling on the subject of aging and having things in order for your families this past month/year due to our own situations with her mother and first my 90 year old in-laws for me and now my aunt.  Martha's mom and my aunt both have "END" stage diseases which create an element all their own, they won't be "cured".  It's what Martha's living right now with her mother as am I with the situation with my aunt, and we hope some of the things we have discussed will be helpful to others to be more prepared before finding themselves or loved ones in similar situations.

Illness and aging are never easy, but the better prepared we are, the more time we can spend with our loved ones instead of spending the time running around trying to get things in order after or when something happens.  Unfortunately, for Martha many of these things came too late and she is pedaling as fast as she can on a daily basis to stay caught up.

Her mother was released to rehab last week and for a few days things appeared to be moving forward.  She was then rushed back to the hospital on Saturday afternoon.  Bottom line, Martha needs all the hugs and prayers we can send so she can cope as they work through this latest crisis.

What do you do to cope?  Me?  I cook.  So today while I was waiting on emails from Martha and worrying for her in hopes that I could vicariously remove some of her stress so she could calmly cope, I baked these blackberry apple turnovers.  

We used to go to this little seaside town when we needed to get away and there was this really awesome seafood restaurant that was an old converted Victorian cottage/house, accepted only cash and always had a long line waiting for them to open their doors at dinner time.  They served awesome seafood of course, but also THE BEST apple blackberry cobbler,  I fell in love with the blackberry apple combination and use it whenever I can.  I normally make my own dough, but opted today for some Pepperidge Farm Puff Pastry I had in the freezer.  They leaked just a little bit, they cleaned up pretty easy!

APPLE BLACKBERRY TURNOVERS

yields 8 turnovers

1 1/4 cups blackberry pieces

1 large Gala or Pink Lady apple, peeled, cored and diced

1/2 cup packed light brown sugar

1/4 teaspoon sea salt

1/4 teaspoon cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon apple pie spice

1 large egg yolk, whipped

1 teaspoon water

1 tablespoon sugar

• Thaw puff pastry according to package directions.
• Lightly flour puff pastry and roll to flatten.
• Toss apple pieces, blackberry pieces, sea salt, cinnamon, apple pie spice and brown sugar until well blended.
• Cut each pastry sheet into 4 pieces.
• Whisk together the egg yolk and water.
• Brush 2 sides of each pastry piece with the egg wash.
• Divide the apple mixture amongst the pastry pieces.
• Bring the points together to form triangles and press firmly together.
• Brush the tops with the remaining egg wash and then sprinkle with the granulated sugar.
• With a sharp knife put 2 small slits in the top as steam vents.
• Bake at 400 degrees for 25-30 minutes.

More about → HUGS, PRAYERS & COPING